Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
