if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
