Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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