At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
