try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
We talked him into tasing himself.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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