Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone came in the potted fern
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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