we made out on top of his cat.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Randomize
