I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Randomize