We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
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