just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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