I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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