u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
My cat gives me a boner
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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