I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
