gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Non-Jews are for practice
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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