evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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