She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
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