Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
