Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
