weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
