ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
NoShamevember. You game?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
