So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
how do you play pong handcuffed?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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