All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
