FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Randomize