Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
