Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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