no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
