I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
