Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people. http://tfl.nu/03zs
  Replies (13) Good night (1255) Bad night (670)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse http://tfl.nu/0v20
  Replies (12) Good night (4830) Bad night (1278)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Oh. He liked you.

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): Oh. He liked you. (970): Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado." http://tfl.nu/je5x
  Replies (22) Good night (1279) Bad night (3419)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account. http://tfl.nu/dorm
  Replies (25) Good night (1216) Bad night (3473)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico. http://tfl.nu/ms4f
  Replies (8) Good night (5083) Bad night (966)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (231): Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk. http://tfl.nu/0k6c
  Replies (5) Good night (4686) Bad night (798)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible. http://tfl.nu/8o92
  Replies (17) Good night (4708) Bad night (1295)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god. http://tfl.nu/bqw0
  Replies (5) Good night (975) Bad night (4007)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help. http://tfl.nu/6hrq
  Replies (10) Good night (1181) Bad night (3682)
• Favorite

  (983): View more from

  I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (983): I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again http://tfl.nu/uu1t
  Replies (11) Good night (661) Bad night (2472)
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (906): Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think. http://tfl.nu/xmje
  Replies (7) Good night (1349) Bad night (871)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation. http://tfl.nu/ib5h
  Replies (0) Good night (628) Bad night (533)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday. http://tfl.nu/u6e3
  Replies (6) Good night (1195) Bad night (644)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun" http://tfl.nu/k4ww
  Replies (9) Good night (1755) Bad night (839)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS! http://tfl.nu/2uiu
  Replies (6) Good night (2354) Bad night (633)

Randomize