The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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