this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Randomize
