am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
