he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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