Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
