addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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