no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.