some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
