I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize