Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I want a musical about memes.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
