she was so not down for the gang bang
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Man, jail baloney is awful.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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