I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
