After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
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