that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
