it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Randomize