Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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