i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
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