Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize