Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
