we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
