we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
