Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
